StormWatch!

Ok - its raining.

Now, I recognize that for much of the world, this doesn't quite rate as "news." But, please understand - I live in Southern California, geographically, a "desert" (don't let those golf courses fool you). So, at the point where the ambient water vapor reaches the point of ...oh, I don't know.. a hot shower... the media goes absolutely buggy with "STORMWATCH 2006!!!!!" and other equally silly proclamations of precipitation of biblical proportions.

Of course, the corollary to this media panic, is the fear on the roadways. Put simply, because it rains so little here - people drive like idiots when their precious sleds get moist. Its like the rain coming down washes away every atom of common sense and driving is suddenly the halftime show at the demolition derby and motocross event.

Of course - even with the idiots - its still better than living other places... like Oregon...

Pay to Play

Today, I continue the ritual of paying for abuse... No, not what you're thinking - There's no pleather involved.

No - today, I write the check to, and go to work out with, the trainer.
Now, before you tell me that paying someone to make you exercise makes as much sense as paying money for people to put tap water in a bottle for you...recognize: I know. I fought this as much as the next person. But, then I found a good trainer and discovered:

1. Losing money makes me less lazy - I have a lot to do. I am blessed with a full-enough life with work, errands, and a big screen tv with an Xbox attached. I have plenty to do. But, now, having paid for the time, I make more time to go to the gym, simply because I don't want to be out the cash I've spent for that session. (Yes, I AM well aware that my good health or physical well being should be motivation enough - but shut up - Warnings about liver damage or throwing up nightly don't stop you from drinking, so leave me be).

2. She knows more than me. Yes, that's right. In amidst all the law stuff, porn, sci fi and other things I might read - I just don't devote enough time to biomechanics. But, like other "mechanics," I pay someone who does have that time and inclination, and knows more. And, while I might curse her name for the pain - she does a good job, and does way more than stand next to the weight bench and count reps. Her knowledge of good exercise practices and torture techniques lost to time since the Spanish Inquisition make her a good choice for workout guide.

So - what choices are you "outsourcing?"

A Rite of Passage (or Not)

Now - I am of the opinion that LOTS of occupations should have some kind of entrance qualification. For those of you curious about the fine folks practicing law in California:

A High Bar for Lawyers
Today, 5,260 people begin taking the state licensing exam. More than half will fail. And keep failing. Just ask the mayor of Los Angeles.By Maura DolanTimes Staff WriterFebruary 21, 2006Former San Francisco Board of Supervisors President Angela Alioto won't even say how many times she failed the California bar examination before she finally was licensed to practice law."Consider it to be several," said the antidiscrimination lawyer and daughter of the late San Francisco mayor and famed antitrust lawyer, Joseph Alioto."And understand," she quickly added, "that for the last two years in a row I have been nominated as a national trial lawyer of the year."
Add two former governors, an eminent legal scholar and a former state Supreme Court justice to the ranks of those, like Alioto, who learned the hard way that obtaining a license to practice law in California is hard. In fact, it's harder than in almost every other state.Of the 5,260 people expected to take the state's bar examination beginning today, more than half are likely to fail, rates from previous years indicate.

Some law school graduates, like Alioto, flunk the bar multiple times before finally passing and becoming lawyers.Others give up.Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, who graduated from an unaccredited law school, finally called it quits after taking the bar exam four times. His office failed to respond to questions, and Villaraigosa, reached as he entered a downtown restaurant, was at a loss to explain why he had been unable to muster a passing score."All I can tell you is that I failed four times," the mayor said.

Failing the bar can be a crushing and humiliating experience, particularly when the applicant has spent months studying or is unaccustomed to failure.Kathleen Sullivan, former dean of Stanford Law School and a former Harvard Law School professor, is considered such a legal superstar that news of her flunking the California bar last year made the front page of the Wall Street Journal. Sullivan remains a full law professor at Stanford and is associated with a private law firm.Although Sullivan is licensed to practice law in New York and Massachusetts, the California Supreme Court last month removed her from litigation over a $500-million licensing dispute because she was not a member of the state bar.
The constitutional scholar, who has argued several times before the U.S. Supreme Court, wasn't eager to talk about the setback, declining to say how much she studied for the bar or how close she came to passing. "That is all past," Sullivan said.She took a special bar exam for lawyers licensed elsewhere that is shorter than the regular test. Only 28% achieved passing scores.
This time, Sullivan is not taking any chances. She said she has immersed herself in study for the test today."I am eating, drinking and sleeping the bar," said the scholar, who is frequently cited as a potential U.S. Supreme Court nominee.Sullivan's failure, while a surprise to the legal community, attests to the exam's challenge.

California's bar "is one of the most difficult," said Erica Moeser, president of the National Conference of Bar Examiners.The three-day test is longer than other states' exams. The score needed to pass also is one of the highest, a factor Moeser believes may explain why applicants are significantly more successful in New York than in California, the states with the largest numbers of people taking the bar.In 2004, only 44% of the 12,448 who took the California bar exam passed.
In New York, where the passing score is lower, 62% of the 12,806 passed, according to Moeser and statistics published by the national bar examiners.Bar officials say the toughness of California's exam ensures that consumers are protected. Moeser surmised that the state also might set the passing score higher because California permits testers who have not graduated from accredited law schools. Most states require testers to graduate from schools accredited by the American Bar Assn.
But even when applicants from only ABA-approved schools are compared, New York still passed a substantially greater percentage than California in 2004, as did most other states.

Oceanside lawyer Donnie R. Cox, who took the bar in 1988 and passed on his first try, recalled a female applicant who wept constantly during the exam while staring into her blue book and wrote not a word. On the second day, Cox said, he brought in earplugs.
Dennis B. Atchley, Cox's law partner, passed on his first try too, in 1976, but the pressure of the experience still haunts him. He said he has a recurring nightmare: Bar examiners inform him they have recalculated his score and he failed. They quickly assure him he can retake the test — in 10 minutes."I have pummeled my wife during that dream," Atchley said.

California's bar requires six essays that can be drawn from among 13 subjects, including contracts, trusts, community property and corporate and constitutional law, in addition to a 200-question multiple-choice test, said Dean Barbieri, director of examinations for the state bar.
Stephen Barnett, professor emeritus at UC Berkeley's law school, said the test "is easy to flunk because it is a difficult exam and requires even the best students of the best teachers to do some serious studying."For those who fail, there is always another chance. Unlike some other states, California lets applicants retake the bar as often as they wish, one of the reasons cited for the state's relatively high failure rate. Someone who fails once is more likely to fail again.Oakland Mayor Jerry Brown, a former California governor who is running for the Democratic nomination for state attorney general, flunked the bar after "studying a little bit, not too much," following his graduation from Yale Law School.The exam had questions about community property and wills and estates, subjects Brown had not studied at Yale, and did not reflect the psychiatry and law course that Brown said he took with the daughter of Sigmund Freud or the class in Roman law taught by a famous Oxford scholar."Yale was more of an intellectual exercise," said Brown, who passed the second time in 1965.

The bar is not necessarily a good measure of what it takes to be a great lawyer, he said."It is more of a rite of passage, a screen to discourage at least half the people," Brown said.

Former California Supreme Court Justice William P. Clark, who flunked out of law school, also had to repeat the bar test. After leaving the state's highest court, Clark served as secretary of the Interior and national security advisor to President Reagan.Former Gov. Pete Wilson graduated from UC Berkeley's elite Boalt Hall School of Law but did not pass the bar until his fourth try. He blamed his struggle on slow penmanship. Wilson said he passed when he used a typewriter to complete the essays."It was frustrating as hell," Wilson said. "I don't think I would have passed it yet had I not been able to type it."

Some critics accuse the bar of deliberately trying to limit competition, a claim the group strongly denies. California is more restrictive than most states about out-of-state lawyers practicing without first taking the state's exam. As a result, some states that do admit lawyers from elsewhere deny that privilege to California's lawyers.The bar "would prefer to raise the fences around California at the price of not being able to practice in other states," said UC Berkeley's Barnett, adding that California has a "richer market" for lawyers than most states.
Harlan Antler, who failed the bar "nine or 10 times," is now a successful criminal-defense lawyer in Sacramento. He said he finally discovered that he had a sleep disorder that was making it difficult for him to stay awake. Once he addressed his medical condition, he passed. But the many years Antler spent taking and retaking the exam took a toll on his family. He said his wife had begged him to give up. He refused."The most important quality of a good lawyer is never taking no for an answer," Antler said. "You just have to keep your eye on the bigger picture. If you want to practice law, you just keep slugging at it."

A Cry For Help

My name is Mitch, and I am an addict.

Now - addicts come in all shapes and sizes. I know you're thinking - oh, great, another guy addicted to: coffee (no, that's Brian Ruff), alcohol, porn, gambling, drugs, japanese anime (I don't know - some people just like those scary-large eyes and high pitched animation thing)....
No - all good suggestions (and perhaps plans for the weekend) - but no - I am addicted to technology.

It all started innocently enough - Sure, a pager (in those apocalyptic pre-cell-phone days). That sounds good. That way, in case of emergency, I can be reached... Well, until basically that became a primary form of communication.
A cell phone - sure, that's better than the pager - Saves a step. I don't have to read and decipher the message and then reply.
Well - those are all gateway technologies. I am a full-blown addict. Two cell phone devices, both "smartphones" with web access, instant messaging, text, etc, including a more advanced device with document drafting and other application availability. Full wired and wireless access in the house, with 3 towers and 2 laptops. The wife selects hotels when travelling by whether they have wireless or highspeed access as a means of enticing me that this is the right place to stay.

Now - When I am in line at the bank, I can surf the web, answer email, play games... and what's worse, I feel cut off from the world when I CAN'T do those things (because of lack of signal strength or something crazy, like leaving the house without my Treo or phone).

Does this sound like a problem?

Mini Summer Vacation

I am bringing back the concept of Summer Vacation (for adults) - Who's with me?!

Summer vacation - those carefree days when time had no meaning, except to define whether it was time to hit Denny's for the Moons over My-Hammy or... the... no...wait - they are a near-perfect food that may be consumed any time day or night!

Which leads me to my present point: Even though most of us carry the marginal trappings of adulthood, we also cling lovingly to the tattered remnants of summer vacation, which is why we all long for Fridays so much (the day of the week - not the artery-busting establishment which prides itself on the prodigious amounts of cheese, salt and bacon that can be added to everything on the menu from the Potato Skins to the Mud Pie).

Yes, we all pine away for Fridays, even though for most of us, that day simply means we trade in our commute to work, and pounding on keyboards like trained chimps, for long peaceful drives to Home Depot or dry cleaners or Best Buy, and the satisfaction of drawing a line through "replace burned out hallway light" off our to-do lists.

No, we must reclaim the magic of our youth and make our weekends (at a minimum) more summer-y:
Why wait for that "special occassion" to visit the restaurant with the really good steaks? Why is there a requirement that you be entertaining out of town guests for you to go to the museum, or the scenic byways of your town? Why does it have to be a bachelor or bachelorette party to justify the alcohol, strippers, goats, pumpkin puree, velcro body suit and... ahem... well... you get the idea. Enjoy life. Break out the good (scotch... china... suit.. whatever).

WHO'S WITH ME?!!?

The Hostage of Valentine

Greetings All,
Its time once again for that hostage crisis known as "Valentine's Day." This is where Hallmark, and the fine folks at local eating establishments conspire to make sure that you spend as much as possible, on a day that they dictate, to prove your affections (for which buying dinner and some vegetation any other time apparently does not convey).

First - A little history: Valentine's Day.
Like most things dealing with Saints, Christianity or the early Church, the lore of Valentine's Day is steeped deep in lore -confusing, often pagan and inconsistent lore.

There are varying opinions as to the origin of Valentine's Day. Some experts state that it originated from St. Valentine, a Roman who was martyred for refusing to give up Christianity. He died on February 14, 269 A.D., the same day that had been devoted to love lotteries. Legend also says that St. Valentine left a farewell note for the jailer's daughter, who had become his friend, and signed it "From Your Valentine". Other aspects of the story say that Saint Valentine served as a priest at the temple during the reign of Emperor Claudius. Claudius then had Valentine jailed for defying him. In 496 A.D. Pope Gelasius set aside February 14 to honour St. Valentine.

The prevailing theory:
Valentine's Day started in the time of the Roman Empire. In ancient Rome, February 14th was a holiday to honour Juno. Juno was the Queen of the Roman Gods and Goddesses. The Romans also knew her as the Goddess of women and marriage. The following day, February 15th, began the Feast of Lupercalia.

Under the rule of Emperor Claudius II Rome was involved in many bloody and unpopular campaigns. Claudius the Cruel was having a difficult time getting soldiers to join his military leagues. He believed that the reason was that roman men did not want to leave their loves or families. As a result, Claudius cancelled all marriages and engagements in Rome. The good Saint Valentine was a priest at Rome in the days of Claudius II. He and Saint Marius aided the Christian martyrs and secretly married couples, and for this kind deed Saint Valentine was apprehended and dragged before the Prefect of Rome, who condemned him to be beaten to death with clubs and to have his head cut off. He suffered martyrdom on the 14th day of February, about the year 270.

At that time it was the custom in Rome, a very ancient custom, indeed, to celebrate in the month of February the Lupercalia, feasts in honour of a heathen god. On these occasions, amidst a variety of pagan ceremonies, the names of young women were placed in a box, from which they were drawn by the men as chance directed.

The pastors of the early Christian Church in Rome endeavoured to do away with the pagan element in these feasts by substituting the names of saints for those of maidens. And as the Lupercalia began about the middle of February, the pastors appear to have chosen Saint Valentine's Day for the celebration of this new feaSt. So it seems that the custom of young men choosing maidens for valentines, or saints as patrons for the coming year, arose in this way.

So - that's the past - What about the present(s)?
Start with a page tradition, incorporate some Roman elements, and then import the whole thing into the Christian Church - and what do you get? Very expensive roses, and Prix Fixe menus at restaurants and the overconsumption of scotchmallows.

I have no issue with expressing one's affections. What I DO have an issue with is being told:
1. There is a specific day you have to do it;
2. Somehow, that food, when consumed in one of three convenient seating schedules, at a fixed price, with fixed selections, somehow conveys MORE affection, than if you went there any other day;
3. That flowers solve everything (ok, well... here, the tradition is correct. But guys, if you're reading this - know - You should always pick random intervals to send flowers, not on "assigned" days. You get MUCH better results).

What we NEED to do is randomly celebrate holidays. http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/Random_20Holiday_20Generator#1096876632

Or, just pick the day you want to do something, and find out the holiday from that day:
http://www.scopesys.com/anyday/

Now, there ARE some traditions associated with this holiday that I DO support (see: Lingerie) but that's a post for another day.

Our Founders 

Food For Thought

"I look forward to a great future for America - a future in which our country will match its military strength with our moral restraint, its wealth with our wisdom, its power with our purpose."

Motivating Workouts

-- My Question: Does this "gym" have a visitors gallery?

Stiletto workout: part of the heeling process

By Claudia ParsonsFri Feb 10, 7:40 AM ET

The gym that brought New Yorkers "Cardio Striptease" has dreamed up "Stiletto Strength," a workout to get women in shape to wear the highest of heels.
At a recent lunch-time session at Crunch gym near Times Square, dancer Amber Efe demonstrated how to strut like a cat-walk model, pivoting on six-inch heels that would challenge even the most ardent follower of shoe king Manolo Blahnik.
"Imagine you're at the bar, raise one hand high like you're holding your drink," she told the class, music pounding as she acted the part of a club-goer working through a crowd.
"Don't spill the drink," she told the group, a mix of women who clearly had plenty of experience and others still tottering on shoes that didn't show much wear.
Crunch's class list includes "Circus Sports" and "Cycle Karaoke" and national fitness director Donna Cyrus said the most popular nontraditional class in recent years was "Cardio Striptease," aerobics with a sexy twist.
"Stiletto Strength" was launched in January in response to client griping about getting back into high heels for winter.
"They're businesswomen and they have to wear heels so they want to understand how to look better in them and feel confident," Cyrus said.
Participants wear running shoes for the first part of the class, which focuses on strengthening lower body and abdominal muscles and improving balance and posture. The heels come out for the last 15 minutes.
"I came at the beginning just because I was curious," said Andrea Kussack, 27, who isn't required to dress up for her job but needs practice wearing "going-out" shoes.
"I recently bought for my boyfriend's Christmas party these really high heels. I made it through the night but it wasn't the most enjoyable thing and I haven't worn them since," she said.
So what is the secret to walking tall?
"Your abs and don't look down. Look where you're going," said instructor Kafi Pierre. "And your ankle strength, if you have weak ankles you'll tend to roll inward or outwards."
Cyrus called in a podiatrist to assess the class, which has been launched in New York, Los Angeles and Miami. "He said 'You know, the answer is women shouldn't wear heels,'" Cyrus said.
But she said women will wear them anyway.
"Your feet will probably never recover because it's not a position you're meant to be in all day long," she said. "This class will strengthen your legs and your core, it will make it less painful, but it will never be pain

Heavenly

"I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time. I have no other restriction as regards smoking. As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my practice never to smoke when asleep and never to refrain when awake. It is a good practice. I mean, for me, but some of you know quite well that it wouldn't answer for everybody that's trying to get to be seventy...Today it is all of sixty years that I began to smoke the limit. If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go." -- Mark Twain